


Fading light

by Ratalien



Category: No Fandom, Original Work
Genre: Anal Sex, Anorexia, Character Death, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Flashbacks, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Homelessness, Homophobia, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Not Beta Read, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-25
Updated: 2020-09-10
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:21:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25503574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ratalien/pseuds/Ratalien
Summary: Simon at 25 years old becomes homeless due to family and survival problems. While also struggling with so many mental health issues. Now he is left with little to nothing except for his violin, so how will paranoid Simon deal with his new life?Rogan is 27 year old man who works for military. He has everything to his name, born in a very rich household. But when he one day saves Simon is where  Rogan finds his goal and weaknesses.
Relationships: Minor or Background Relationship(s), Original Male Character/Original Male Character
Comments: 5
Kudos: 3





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my first story so it won't be great. I've been having this idea for very long time and I must pay contribute to this amazing site. Ummm the city won't be specified because the country is supposed to be like America or something and I don't live there so I don't know anything about it. It will have it's districts and all but it will be purely my imagination that makes them. Also I apologise on my afull English (it's not my first language) and my bad writing. Also there will be a lot of mental health issues so brace yourself. Also TRIGGER WARNING.

_Simon_

Simon didn't have a phone nor enough clothes or money when he exited the bus. Only a small bag in his right hand and a violin on his back. The city was huge and something he couldn't believe it exited. He's been living under a rock of his abusive family for a long time and his neighbourhood wasn't the greatest. So this new, big city brings a lot of fear with it. Currently Simon didn't know what to do, feeling dizzy from all the shock that went through. People were walking, running probably knowing where to go, and Simon is just here standing like a plant.

He heard his stomach grumble, a familiar filling that he very well knew and would ignore. But this time he is paranoid. ' _Uh I gotta find someplace to eat'_ while getting through crowd and spotting a bakery. Inside it looked luxurious and smelled divine. He has a small portion of money that probably won't last even three days. _'cake...too many calories, muffins also too many calories. I need to lose weight...'. Some assistant said "Um can I help you sir?" while looking at him from head to toe. After few minutes it took, he got himself a small price of bread. Founding a fountain in the middle surrounded by a few chairs while all around tall skyscrapers and buildings were surrounding him. There were a market tags, commercial tags that he didn't know nothing about, occasionally people would glance his way and stare, more than they should. Feeling already depressed he took his small bread and started counting_ _' one, two, three okay that should be enough'_ only three pinches of bread for today is all that Simon ate. Currently it was 9 Am in the beginning of the spring, and his plan on finding a place to sleep didn't occur, so he started to panic, and panic. Moving forward to find a isolating place to sleep, preferably a park. _'maybe, I should really just die. Probably, but I am to big of a pussy to do that, after all I can't do anything right...' While walking into the traffic and almost getting hit by a car his adrenaline level is extremely high. But at least he found a park. It was huge, again something he hadn't seen before. There was nice roadway, a large open space with grass ,nicely kept flowers and few chairs. He came clos_ e to a statue of some kind of priest and found another homeless person sleeping on a grass. From the looks of it, it was a man probably in his 50s, he looked dirty, his beard and hair were long. Simon was little bit relieved to know that he found a lot of homeless people on the way here. Simon knows he has to sleep for the night and probably will be on the grass. He's not even scared about bugs that may crawl, he's only scared that the next morning his violin will be stolen. So he explored the vast park and found a large bush that was near to some kind of wall, so he got inside of the bush getting few scratches here and there. He was visibly shaking from fear, anxiety and cold. He laid on the ground thankful that it wasn't covered in shit or urine. He used his bag as pillow, some spare clothes as blanket that didn't stop his shaking and with his arms and legs hugged his violin case. As he was staring at some beetle on the ground the feeling of guilt and hopelessness overflew him at his new life. In times like these Simon likes to talk to himself ' _you know I don't know why I am even here. If you ask me I should be dead'_ said the first voice. But then second voice came ' _you know, you said at 28 you are going to kill yourself, so everything is going according to plan'_ ,then the third voice said ' _yea right. You know what he won't kill himself now or ever because he's evil and deserves to get the worst treatment for things he did'._ And with that Simon started crying, because he agrees with everything he thinks and feels.

_Rogan_

"Okay Rogan, I've done my paperwork on all the occuring that has happened, do you need any help with that" his co-worker asked. " Oh, nah I'm fine, just reading some reports, I think I got it handled, but thanks anyway." While Sarah got to the exit door she shouted " Yo, at what time will you be here tomorrow!?", " Hmm, uhh at 2 PM, but I'll come here earlier". 

When Rogan was done with his work it was almost midnight, he works as a liutenenet at the military. Teaching and training young specialist and officers alike. As Rogan was in his car thinking what he should eat and concerned about leaving his dog alone. Okay he didn't leave him alone he asked his sister to take care of him, but still his dog was very timid. After almost one hour, he arrives at the gates of his neighbor. Guard let's him in as he parks his car in his garage. Rogan house was big, but not big as his parents house. He grew up in rich household and he is thankful that neither him or his brother Eric and his sister Lara weren't spoiled. Rogan is kinda happy that he lives simplistic life and in a smaller hose, it still has it's own pool inside and everything looks luxurious. As he entered he was bombarded with a sound of barking, as his Pomeranian ran twords him, wanting affection. "Lara, you here?" nothing "I know you're here, because you left the door unlocked." As he entered his white, pristine living room he found his sister laying on his comfy couch with headphones listening to some pop. She opened her eyes and suddenly jumped " oh hey, your back. How was work" "eh it was fine. Thanks for helping me out with Milo". She made a waving motion"nah it wasn't a problem. Although I would much rather prefer that it wasn't this late. Plus your dog is really, really difficult. I'm completely drained". Rogan was laughing as his sister moved past him to the doorway, he asked" you know you can sleep here?", she replied " oh no, I'm sleeping at my friend's place, so I need to get movin. She's probably waiting outside of your gated community" with that they exchange goodbyes, and she leaves.

Rogan wasn't feeling tired as he was as he was watching some movie while eating and cuddling with his dog. This was the best part of his day. He went couple of times to check on Milo's needs, but he was fine, they both only wanted to cuddle. Especially these days as he remembered his ex that had broken up with him, and confessed about lying about a lot of things as well as cheating. So the past week was really helpless, but things are better now hopefully. One part of his mind tells him that he needs a boyfriend, there's that need but then again his relationships didn't last a month, and Rogan appreciates longevity. As it rolled around1 AM, he pulled himself up to his room, and just crash down on his king-size bed as Milo was sleeping in his mini bed. _'hopefully I get some sleep, gosh dang it. Why do I need to think of my ex when everything is literally going fine'_ and with that he finally fell asleep at 3 Am.


	2. Chapter 2.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello.  
> New chapter. I will try to upload more, because summer is over.  
> I hope I don't lose my groove.  
> Also sorry if my writing gets progressively worse, it's just how it is with me.  
> Again thnx everybody who reads my rubbish.
> 
> TRIGGER WARNING!!!

_Simon_

Simon had been woken up by someones voice"Hahaha, go to hell you old piece of shit", the voice was distant but it was near and clearly not directed towards him. The sounds of laughter and grunting could be heard not to far from Simon's bush. He positioned himself so that he could see whats going on whilst still remaining hidden. In the middle of the dawn Simon could see four men laughing, spitting and kicking some old man. Simon recognized that old man from day before,that now was laying broken on the grass covered in his own blood. "What is a homeless, dirty piece of shit even doing here" as one of the men said and kicked the old man in his stomach by full force.

Simon felt uneasy as the old man started coughing and shouting in an old worn out tone" Argh... go away, please leave me... what did I do". While the others started laughing and continued beating that poor old man. 

Simon just froze in one place afraid that he'll be noticed and then beaten up in this park. The old man was continuing to shout but nothing, his voice becoming more muted."Yo look, old dude's got ring. Where is your wife? Hmm, probably fucking somebody right now" to witch others laughed. They were stomping on his hand causing it to break and then stole his ring. Simon also heard insults such as _homeless piece of shit, trash, dirty hobo..._ which got him paranoid about his future ' _is this how will I end up?'_

After awhile police came, literary out of nowhere. They were after all in park that was surrounded by nearby building in which people lived in. The four man began to run while leaving motionless corps of an old man on the floor. From far away he looked like bunch of blankets covering one another, he had a lot of wounds, open scars and deformed hand. Policemen caught all of the four men, two of them were drunk so they started vomiting. Then after awhile hospital came, by now dawn passed. They picked up the old now dead man, his hand completely detached from it's arm. The other doctors cleaned the bloodstains as effective as they could, no one will know what had happened here.

After everybody was gone Simon couldn't stop shaking from fear and despair. _'I'm gonna die here...... well that's the reason why I'm here?'._ To calm himself down Simon raised his left sleeve revealing old wound and scars. And then he franticly started clawing his left forearm with his nails. His pale forearm now had rows of red scratch marks and from few places blood started to pour. He accidentally reopened old cut wounds but he didn't care, he pulled some spare shirt to use as cloth. The stinging pain worked like a drug and it always helped to calm him down, but afterwords he wanted to crawl inside a hole and rot there.

Simon remembered there was a fountain in this park so he washed his shirt to help the wound heal, his wound took a long time to heal. He was sitting on a bench trying to think what should he do. A man came to sit on the same bench that Simon was sitting on. The man looked old, round, with white overgrown hair and grey beard, he had stains everywhere on his face, clothes, shoes. Simon instantly got up to walk away, but man said"Eh, did you hear what happened my friend here in morning, but... you probably saw everything from that bush you were in". Simon felt attacked and scared so he just quickly said"No, I don't know" and started to walk faster to random direction. 

Two hours passed while Simon continued to walk, not lifting his head as he continued to battle with his own mind. One part of himself said _' Please, please... just jump from that building. You know you can, why wait?" ._ Then he came to a stop, he was beginning to find isolated space, so he did. He just sat at the stone corner near some shop, where he hoped no one will notice him. 

As time was passing by Simon was just observing people that were passing, far away he could see small schoolgirls which reminded him of how stupid he is and was. Simon was never good at school, he always tried but he was just getting bad grades. Some handsome guy passed passed and reminded him of a lot of issues, how ugly and disgusting he is and feels. How he never was a real man, he was always crying. 

And there is the fact that he was attracted to other man.... but Simon doesn't wan't to think about that, because for him that is mental illness that ruins everything.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoy it. I know I didn't. And again please forgive my lack of talent in writing.


End file.
